Through the roof!

Last week I went to the hospital to get the results of my blood tests. Turned out that my testosterone levels were 55. They should be between 11 and 30. Some might think: wow, that's great, right? No. There is a max for a reason. The surplus gets turned into estrogen which is something I really don't want. It explains why I have been feeling a bit grumpy to say the least. There is this phenomenon called 'roid rage' which is known among bodybuilders who use too much steroids in order to get bigger. They tend to get a tad aggressive. Well, having a uterus and all, I'd say it feels more like PMS. So there you have it. Seriously, I could kill someone while having PMS. I'm sure I'm not the only person who feels that way. Women just have more control. 

So, grumpy, restless and tired, which is always a great combination, and still the nausea. I have cut back on how much testosterone I put on and the nausea did get a lot better. Yesterday I forgot my testosterone and I was actually feeling really well. It took me a while to realize it was because I wasn't nauseous. Actually, I didn't realize that until today. I was at the end of my bottle and decided to squeeze the last bit out which was a lot more then I should be taking. So later this afternoon the nausea hit me again, pretty bad. Very annoying. I ignored it best I could and managed quite well but it did make me realize how strongly I still react. I hope that with the new dose and lower blood levels the nausea will go away. It sounds like such a simple little thing. Silly almost. But it makes it hard to eat and when you constantly feel like that it really takes up quite a bit of energy to ignore it. Fingers crossed. 

The good news is that the ginger beard looks promising. Last Friday several friends noticed my stubbly chin and cheeks and all had to have a feel. It would be awesome if I had a full beard for my next birthday. With this rate it might even be possible. 

Also, some of my shirts are getting too tight around my shoulders. Most of the time I still feel like I look pretty skimpy but every now and then I catch a glimpse in the mirror and surprise myself. One day I might actually believe what I see and it will be me.

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