Monday, January 27, 2014

Plot twist: Noodweer, Japan and paintings.

Four years ago Chris and I set up an exhibition for my artwork. By change we got our hands on a really nice space and asked 2 other artists to join in. After the first exhibition we were able to stay a bit longer and set up another one, and then another. Gallery Noodweer was born. Eventually the owner found someone who wanted to rent the space so we had to move on. But we'd had so much fun organizing this we decided to look for a new space and continue our work. And now are yet again forced to move out of the space we have, for the 4th time in as many years. After some debate we decided it is time to finish this project and move on. We had a great time. We learned a lot. Hopefully we inspired others as much as they inspired us. As much as we regret having to quit we came to the conclusion that, right now, in this economic climate, it is simply not possible to run a gallery in this set up. We have one final exhibition in February by Boukje van Iperen which I am really looking forward to. Her work is amazing and I'm glad we can finish with a bang.

So what happens to Noodweer? We need to take a look at what we want, what we want it to mean, what we want to do for people, and how we would want to achieve that. I'm not sure yet how this will take shape. It will take some time to re-evaluate everything that has happened and also to get over our loss. I'm sure Chris and I will collaborate again in the future but right now we need a bit of a breather.
This didn't just happen yesterday so I have had some time to think. I have been thinking a lot about that I want to do with my life in general lately. I had been making plans to go abroad for a while; move to Japan and see if I would have more luck there with my artwork. But then I realized it's hard to get visa so I started looking for easy ways to get one. And then I started looking at courses and job options and before I knew it all these things were no longer about art. Losing Noodweer made me realize that art really is the most important thing in my life and my main focus should really be on my art. I keep losing myself in distractions and I'm not getting anywhere with my career as an artist. I need to stop doing that. I would still love to go to Japan for a while. I love to travel anyway and I would really like to again. But it's not something I should pursue in a way that means sacrificing my art. I need to start taking my work seriously. If I don't, no one else will. Why is this so hard? Because it's got my blood, sweat and tears in it. It's my hopes and dream, my fears and nightmares. My soul. And having that rejected is the hardest thing there is. There is no way I can make it as an artist without going through a lot of rejection first and that part really, really sucks. I'm dreading that part. I know how hard it is going to be as I have tried it before and didn't make it. But this time I feel like I am ready and somehow the idea of succeeding is starting to get scary as well. What do I do then? I know it's way to early to start worrying about that. I still have a long way to go. It's time to take a deep breath and dive in.

1 comment:

  1. You MUST be true to yourself and focus on your painting. You had the courage to become man so you have the courage to walk the road to be being recognised as a great artist.